What we leave behind

Picture: Footprints in the sand on beach at sunset, Golds Bluff Beach, Redwood National Park, Humboldt County, California

Long time readers of this blog will know about some of my own personal incidents that happened over the last 12 months, and how I expressed their impact on my life perspective.

Yesterday, I found myself, aware only after the fact, that I was the last person to see someone alive, taking their last steps on the planet. I’ve been fully engulfed in my current book project, trying to avoid any mental distractions. This included much of the social media aspects that I find so enjoyable, yet so distracting. Then came a knock on the door yesterday morning. It was the local police.

I won’t go into the details, but the tragic result was that one of our neighbors, in an apparently depressed and drunken rage, had taken her own life. All I could think about for the rest of the day was her two great teenage kids that she left behind. The daughter even babysat our kids on numerous occasions. I was swept with such a deep wave of sadness for them, that I could do practically nothing else but pace the house with my stomach in a knot. My brain raced for much of the day, wondering what must have been in this woman’s mind, to be so deep in despair as to not consider what she would be leaving behind, namely her kids, and the impact her actions would have on them for the rest of their lives.

As we go through life, we are always leaving a little bit of our legacy behind us; big or small, subtle or blatant. The actions we take will always impact others, for better or worse. It’s the unavoidable web of life. But the effect of a suicide on a family is the biggest, hugest, most avoidable impact, and the saddest legacy anyone could ever leave behind.

I really should be working now. But I felt absolutely compelled to share this story, and encourage anyone that may feel like checking themselves out to please, please, please – reach out and talk to someone. Think about the effect that kind of action would have on the one’s you leave behind. There is always another answer, and a better option.